Jan 16, 2012

Maybe I Can Drive My Car

I've been sputtering and farting toward getting a driver's license for years (and years) now and running out of gas before I get any bit comfortable behind the wheel. My permit has been burning a hole in my pocket and I've decided, today, that this might have to be the year. I don't know that I even want to drive; I just know that I don't want to not drive (wait, is that a double negative? what I am not trying to not say here?)

I have lots of clever quips and reasons to not drive but the plain truth is that I'm scared. Scared of aggressive drivers and even more aggressive pedestrians. Scared that I won't be able to monitor the seat warmer, radio, mirror, and road at the same time. Scared that "road" ranks last in the list of things I think I need to monitor. Scared that I close my eyes when passing buses and trucks. Scared that I've become so used to falling asleep in the passenger seat that I'll nod off at a light. Scared that an aggressive pedestrian will beat me for blocking the crosswalk. Scared, just plain scared.
Rather than focus on my fears, I know I should try to focus on the potential joys of driving, like road rage, a warm butt, new driving shoes, a new car—Granny-Smith-green vintage VW Beetle or Mini, and music—loud music that makes people dance and wave when I drive by.

The soundtrack to the vision of me driving is Van Morrison. Actually, it's Van Morrison's Into The Mystic, on repeat. The song just makes me happy. I see myself cruising down an empty (coastal) highway, my hair blowing wildly in the seabreeze (hair in my eyes is not a problem on empty highway), smiling and singing "We were born before the wind, Also younger than the sun .... I -IIIII-I want to rock your gypsy soul, Just like way back in the days of old ..." honking the horn for the saxaphone parts.
Y'know, according to a BBC survey, Into The Mystic is among the most popular songs doctors listen to while operating. Maybe I'll hear it there, too, after I "let my soul and spirit fly" ... into the Hudson.

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